Shame is an issue at the very heart of the recovery process. Claudia Black provides the viewer an understanding as to why they feel the way they do and she offers them a language to use to describe their experiences.

Shame - The painful feeling that comes with the belief there is something inherently wrong with who you are. To live with shame is to believe that you are inadequate, insufficient, less than, not good enough, bad, dirty, damaged goods. Those are many of the words that people use as a part of their inner self-talk that reinforces the internalized unhealthy shame.

Embarrassment is a sense of insecurity.

Guilt is when you make a mistake.

Shame is when you believe you are the mistake.

When embarrassment and guilt are chronic, they convert to shame.

Using stories, graphics and examples, Claudia explains the difference between Guilt, Embarrassment, and Shame. She describes how issues ranging from control to perfectionism, depression to compulsivity are aspects of toxic shame - the belief that one is inherently defective.

Throughout this video, Claudia weaves a message of recovery and says, Remember that as a child you had so little power to determine how you would react to the world. Your reaction was that of a child, with the vulnerability of a child. You were not bad, you never were and you are not today.

Preview

To view the first 5 minutes of this video, click on the View Video Clip. You will need to have QuickTime Media Player installed on your computer. A free download is available here.

Running time is 30 minutes.

The issues of shame are also reflected in Claudia's video Issues of Recovery.

Handout

To further your use of the Shame video, see Helpful Documents at the bottom of this page for a handout that you are free to use with clients.